The Garden Community for Garden Lovers

Building bridges


By drc726


I have loved my time on GOY overall. I had never joined an internet site before I found this one looking up plants and thought I would give it a go.
The group dynamics took a bit of getting use to, understanding how some come across abrupt, some jolly, some serious, some quick to take offence and realising that a reply/question can be so misunderstood.
I have been shocked at what has been said over the last couple of days and found it hard to understand the attitude towards one particular member?
Until this evening when for the first time I read the blog on coffee now I understand the member’s reactions.
It seems that from what has been said this has happened before? And therefore is likely to happen again! Perhaps in future the best thing would be to ignore this type of blog/reply rather than keep responding as no one can argue with themselves?
I have written this with shaking hands in the hope it is now possible for us all to move on from this and heal? What do others think?

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Lets hope so! I think its awful to allow someone like that to upset so many people!
As Digger says, DONT FEED THE TROLL!

Its time we remembered that we are (in the main) all FRIENDS here, and are here to share, commune & support each other, something I have found to be the joy of GoY!! (Twee, I know)
I think you're right, Denise, these people do not deserve our answers, thoughts or emotions!

20 Sep, 2009


Like you Drc this the only site I use as truly shocked at how some members talk to one another on other sites.

This spat quite mild and its a fine line between expressing opinions and ensuring no offence is caused.

Yes happened before - often by new members who show no respect to etiquette of site and therefore always likely to happen in future.Peter and Ajay try to minimize this but at end of day we should be able to express opinions without recourse to personal insults.

That said we cant please all the people all the time eventually you learn who is in tune with you as so many members impossible to track everyone.

One member said if dont like you will delete or block all comments blogs photos etc .. no need for that just add someone to favourites so not to miss their input.

Not a question of not liking someone ..just one of expressing personal preference.

20 Sep, 2009


I hope some of you saw that last comment, which I have now deleted!

20 Sep, 2009


I don't know what this is all about. Why are people suddenly writing blogs to 'cheer us up' ? I think I've missed something.

20 Sep, 2009


i dont need cheering up I am a very happy bunny . Tomorrow is my first day of my 9 days holiday and I will be spending every day in my greenhouse and garden.I need to get right on top of all my flower beds and have a good old tidy up. Also i will posting photos on Goy

20 Sep, 2009


Aaah the haven called the greenhouse
I love spending many anhour there with no hubby, no kids, just me lots of pots and seeds and a huge bag of compost


x x x

20 Sep, 2009


Hywel, you really DONT want to know!

20 Sep, 2009


Drc thanks for writing this blog, and I totally agree with everything you have said. Bad feeling can be difficult to deal with and spoils the enjoyment of using this site. I agree the best way to deal with unpleasant or offensive comments is to ignore or flag them rather than feeding the troll (what an apt phrase). :o)

20 Sep, 2009


B, I didnt see it! :~((

20 Sep, 2009


I've tried other sites but this is the only one I've visited more than a couple of times. The overall atmosphere on here is helpful, polite and friendly and this is the essence of GoY. May it quickly return and stay with us. I agree silence is golden when we find a disagreeable person in our midst. Happy gardening everyone :o))

20 Sep, 2009


To you too, Lily!!

20 Sep, 2009


Donnah...that sounds like heaven to me...must take a few days off myself...if only!!!

20 Sep, 2009

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