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A Camellia for my Parents

lily2

By lily2

26 comments


Camellia “Debbie” has always been one of my favourite Camellias so I was delighted when I found a very special place to plant this one.

I’ve never felt the need to mark the anniversaries of the dates on which my parents died. Indeed it’s so long ago, 40 years for my Dad and 27 years for my Mum that I no longer knew exactly when those dates were.

My visits to the crematorium in Norfolk have been very few and although undoubtedly a beautiful and peaceful place, I’ve never felt a connection with my parents there. Recently I received a letter telling me that the rose bush planted in their memory was due for renewal. I agreed with my brother and sister that as we all now lived so far away and rarely visit, there was little point in paying the hundreds of pounds requested for this renewal and upkeep.

However, this left the problem of what to do with the commemorative plaque. I couldn’t bear the thought of it being scrapped so by a very roundabout route it finally found it’s way to me, in a very dirty state.
I decided to plant something in my garden with the plaque at the base so I could have them near me always and think of them every time I pass by, not just on anniversaries and other odd times. What plant to choose……..not another rose, I love the flowers but not the plant so what better than a Camellia with it’s roselike flowers…..and what better than one I have carefully tended from a twig.

This lovely shrub has been growing in a succession of pots for about 5 years but had started to let me know that it’s roots were in need of freedom.

Here it is now, happily in it’s new home where I can see it from my windows, with the cleaned and repainted plaque at the base.

Maybe some might find this odd in a garden but, in the same way as we commemorate our pets, why not the two most important people in my life? After all, without them I would not be here.

!

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Comments

 

I think that is a wonderful way to comemorate the most important people in your life. What a beautiful Camelia too. Lovely blog Lily

26 Mar, 2011

 

lovely x

26 Mar, 2011

 

A really nice idea Lily and and the Camelia is a beautiful tribute. I feel the same as you about roses!

26 Mar, 2011

 

I'm pleased you have had the plaque returned, albeit it in a dirty state! That's a bit cheeky, isn't it? Believe it or not, one set of my grandparents were Ernest & Kathleen. I love the Camellia you have nurtured and agree that it will be lovely to see the plaque beside it every day. Nothing odd about what you've done at all! Well done, Lily. : o ))

26 Mar, 2011

 

what a lovely story lily and a great idea to have the plaque and such a pretty camelia to remember mum and dad, much better than hidden away in cemertry where you dont really go anymore, i think its a lovely idea ;o)

26 Mar, 2011

 

beautiful camelia lily,and a nice way to remember loved ones

26 Mar, 2011

 

what a lovely way to remember your parents Lily,thank you for sharing this with us ..

26 Mar, 2011

 

I think thats lovely Lily, i bought a statue in memory of my husbands best friend who died very suddenly in a freak accident, it doesn't have a plaque but whats the difference really, and as you no longer live near where they were i think thats a good idea. Lovely plant too

26 Mar, 2011

 

Thank you Cinderella, Daylily and Troddles, I'm glad you liked my idea and the camellia too :o)
Hi Shirley, not only was the plaque dirty, but they wouldn't post it to me either. The person who went to collect it for me (a friend of a relative) had to go and find it and pull it out of the ground! Yes that's a bit of a coincidence with the names, not ones you hear nowadays.
Thanks Sandra, yes I shall think of them much more often now :o))
Glad you enjoyed the blog Ladybug and Joanella, thank you for your comments.

26 Mar, 2011

 

YW lily :o))

26 Mar, 2011

 

Lily what a beautiful thought and a beautiful camelia.
How awful that they would not post the plaque to you.

I too could never connect to a crematorium, much better that you think of them in your garden.

26 Mar, 2011

 

Its not odd at all Lily, I planted a tree in my garden for my mum and often have a cuppa with her.........

26 Mar, 2011

 

Thats a lovely idea Lily, a lot of people have their loved ones ashes in their gardens and this looks gorgeous

26 Mar, 2011

 

YW???? Sandra
Ah thanks Val, all camellias are beautiful but I do love this one. It's a good job I had a good chain of people to get it for me although it did take a long time to get here by the time it was passed along! Don't know if I'd connect better with a grave as I've never been in that situation.
It's only the plaque I thought some might find odd Lincs, I've got a tree planted along with my cat's ashes. It's big now and we've always called it the 'Sandy' tree :o)

26 Mar, 2011

 

Thank you Sixpence, I'd never have thought to put human ashes in the garden but it is a lovely idea.

26 Mar, 2011

 

I used to tidy a garden for one of Mum's friends and was a bit surprised when, as she showed me around the garden, hidden beneath the Geranium foliage were three lovely pieces of slate, each engraved, one for her husband, one for a son and the third for a niece. She asked if it would bother me that their ashes were in the ground! At first, I didn't like the idea of weeding around the plants, but, eventually found it quite comforting for her to think her loved ones ashes were within her garden. : o )

26 Mar, 2011

 

Yes Shirley, I think I would find it comforting but not sure how I'd feel if I had to move house. I don't remember being offered ashes at the time, maybe it's a newer thing?

26 Mar, 2011

 

Distasteful though it sounds, I guess the urn, where the ashes are contained, could simply be retrieved? Anyway, let's not get too morbid! I think what you've done is really lovely and thoughtful. : o))
YW = you're welcome! Another one to confuse anyone learning English.....

26 Mar, 2011

 

That was a nice thing to do Lily.
Now you have given me an idea. My parents once went to a wedding, and instead of cards to show where they sat in the reception, there were little pebbles with their names painted on them.
I found the pebbles when we were clearing out the house recently. I think I shall put them in the garden by the rose sent in memory of them from a neighbour.
:o)

27 Mar, 2011

 

Thats a lovely idea Hywel :0)

27 Mar, 2011

 

Lovely camelia.. and a lovely way to remember your parents...

27 Mar, 2011

 

A great idea Hywel, I remember your blog about a rose, was it that one? Sometimes we have these things like your pebbles and my plaque that we can't bear to part with because of their associations and it's lovely when we can find something to do with them :o))

27 Mar, 2011

 

Yes it's the same rose as in the blog. It's called Gentle Hermione.

28 Mar, 2011

 

Hi SK, sorry I missed your earlier comment, I think we posted at the same time! Yes it's lovely to have reminders of loved ones in the garden and a statue seems very fitting for a man I think. I like having plants given me by friends too so I can think of them when I'm out there. :o)
Thanks Holly, I have 3 Camellias now - 1 red, 1 cream and this pink one. Don't think I've got room for any more! :o(
Hi Shirley, no an urn wouldn't be a problem but I was thinking more of scattered ashes.

28 Mar, 2011

 

I found this quite moving,Lily,and it brought back a lot of memories,as both my parents died in the same years as yours.I wish I could have done something like this,its a lovely tribute to them.mine are at rest in Cumbria,where we used to live..so not really an option now..but memories are with us forever,aren't they ?

31 Mar, 2011

 

Hi Bloomer, how right you are about memories. I've been so long without my parents that they are forever young(ish) to me and it also means I've never had the problems that can come with very elderly parents. That must be about the only good thing about losing them so early. I'm so glad you liked the blog, what a coincidence that the years are the same.

31 Mar, 2011

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