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How Do I Get Out Of This One?

dioritt

By dioritt

30 comments


Mum has a gardener coming on Monday to do some of the heavy ground work in her back garden. When he first came round he seemed quite uninterested and kept telling us how if we were going to get several quotes then to give it to somebody else because he “doesn’t work like that”. The second time he came he was flirting wildly with me (and I mean WILDLY), and I felt quite uncomfortable. Everything he said had some kind of innuendo attached to it. I told Mum at that point that I wasn’t comfortable with him but she insisted he was ok and was just having a laugh so I went ahead and hired him.

Last week Mum announced that she’d been thinking about it and she didn’t like the idea of being alone with him (I can only get there afternoons) and could I find somebody else? I managed to find two who were interested but they’re not coming round to have a look and give us quotes until Wednesday and Thursday evenings, which means that I’d have to tell the original guy on Friday that the job’s off. That just feels like it’s leaving it too late to me.

The guy we’ve hired told me he’d call to let me know where to get the turf from after looking into the latest prices and quality etc but I’ve not heard anything from him. I’m also supposed to order topsoil, gravel and a lawn stripper this week, ready for when he starts but I can’t unless I know that’s actually what we’re going to need (if Mum decides to go with one of the new guys, they may not be able to start next Monday).

I’m really frustrated over this now. I really don’t want to have to phone this guy on Friday and find some excuse as to why he can’t start on Monday when it’s been left this late, but I also don’t want to start ordering stuff if it’s going to be stuck on Mum’s front lawn for a few weeks (there’s already a skip and one tonne bag of soil on the drive so no more room there). I should really phone him to find out about the turf (even though he said he’d contact me) but I don’t want to do that either if we’re not going to use him.

If only Mum had agreed with me in the first place instead of changing her mind at the 11th hour.

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Comments

 

dont like the sound of this guy get on the phone to him soon as possible and tell him your brother in law is going to do the job to save on costs,i live in cheshire & do this type of work,if you are within reasonable mileage i would gladly give you a free reasonable estimate

22 Jun, 2010

 

But do you think he'd make us pay something anyway, being as it's been left this late?

I'm in Crewe. I don't know whether that's within reasonable mileage of you?

22 Jun, 2010

 

Call him and just tell him you found someone cheaper/better/can start work sooner. Obviously i don't know but from what you say....Cowboy springs to mind!!!

22 Jun, 2010

 

I've a feeling he's a cowboy too. I got bad vibes from him right from the off, but as I said, Mum just kept saying he was only having a laugh. I think she felt a bit desperate to get it done and that we might not find somebody else, especially as he kept telling her how expensive everybody else is compared to him.

I really hate making this kind of phone call :-(

22 Jun, 2010

 

Tell him to get on his horse and ride off into the sunset ,and get someone else ,

22 Jun, 2010

 

Don't hesitate,Dioritt..pick up the phone.!You owe him nothing.He hasn't supplied you with any materials has he?.I personally wouldn't be happy about this guy,and your mum doesn't seem to be either I don't want to upset you,but some of these workmen think that they can charge what they like,when its ladies ,and think they won't complain...far from it.! I would just put up with the skip,soil etc that you have,and look around a bit more,or wait what the other two have to say..Do you know anyone in your area that could give you a recommendation ,if they have had work done? I can see its so difficult for you,
Please give it some thought,Dioritt.

22 Jun, 2010

 

We have something called 'Check-a-trade'which recommends bona fide tradesmen, it's run by the local Council. Maybe worth ringing your local Council to see if they have similar. I would not employ this man, from what you've said, definitely a rogue trader by the sounds of it. Don't worry about the phone call, he's probably been rejected many times before !

22 Jun, 2010

 

Ps to first comment, have Googled Checkatrade, it's a national thing, just Google it and click on to your area, do it NOW !

22 Jun, 2010

 

i agree with shirley call someone now, dont have the first guy sounds like a perv to me, steer clear, i hate men like that who say things and not just joking, they mean it, also dont worry about cancelling him, just tell him its not possible at this time, ifact tell him you dont feel comfurtable with him i would,

22 Jun, 2010

 

You must really go by gut instincts and this guy sounds dodgy

22 Jun, 2010

mrv
Mrv
 

Speaking as a freelance Gardener myself - simply phone and cancel the first guy, you need give no reason. But if you feel you do need to explain tell him that you feel that some of his comments were not appropriate and that you have found someone else. You need to have a good and trusting relationship with your gardener.

When you undertake work in someone elses property - it is a workplace and comes under all of the same rules. Sexual remarks = sexual harrassment ... end of story.

I'm also concerned as to why the second lot are supposed to be turfing in JUNE!!! This does not sound like a crew that are interested in your Mum's garden - rather making a quick bit of cash and having your Mum soaking turf every evening for the next month. If they are out making lots of quick cash they are too busy to speak to you. I would put a stop to your arrangement with them now .... re-plan after finding local tradespersons and turf in September.

Sorry I'm not closer

22 Jun, 2010

 

Oh dear I think this is a good one for a TV programme on 'How I got taken in by a fraudster'. He doesn't sound at all like a professional gardener. Have you a male somewhere in the family, friend or neighbour range with plenty of height, brawn or a dominating character? A female with the afore mentioned would also do!! Have them on hand if he comes. Or, if you phone ( and I recommend you do so) just say your piece and put down the phone immediately! Also, I think the local police would listen to you in this case as they may have heard of others in the same plight.
Go on do it, do it, do it, Or give me his number as he won't know where I am phoning from - come to that we could all ring him up for you! How about it?

22 Jun, 2010

 

I've just read your comment, Lyn, love the idea of all of us phoning him ... lol !!

22 Jun, 2010

 

i hope you called instantly and cancelled,always listen to your gut instinct and never doupt it,will look in tomorrow to see whats happening,chris

22 Jun, 2010

 

I would do what Mrv stated and would nt give an explanation either, and do not say sorry as by saying that he could turn it around to indimidate you. Just cancel giving no reason. I would be short but direct and say, Hello I am cancelling state who it is and then put the phone down simple.

22 Jun, 2010

 

well i agree with everybodys comments, just ring an cancel him, its awful for you know how you feel, i have bin ripped of that many times with things, cos i am a women on my own its awful, good luck , and take care :o)

22 Jun, 2010

 

I agree with everything said above, take your courage in both hands, phone and say 'NO THANK YOU'. You owe him nothing, not even an explanation; you've just changed your mind. And I recomend you report him to the authorities asap. Good Luck; (not that you'll need it as I know you will be doing the right thing). And another thing, how can he make you pay for work he hasn't done, or for materials he hasn't provided?

22 Jun, 2010

 

I also agree with all the above. Every comment is right. Please make that call don't be intimidated by this cowboy. You just need to take courage from every one of these comments we are all behind you.

22 Jun, 2010

 

Well said Mrv.

22 Jun, 2010

 

Dioritt, don't hesitate, call him and cancel. Whether he's genuine or not, whether he's a good gardener or not, and whether he's reasonably priced or not, are irrelevant. Both you and your mum are uncomfortable around him and that's a good enough reason, and don't worry any more about it.

22 Jun, 2010

 

Well folks, Mum phoned him and used the brother-in-law excuse (well, a friend of a friend, actually) and he wasn't entirely happy. He called her back saying that he'd turned work away in order to do her garden and now he'd be without income that week but would still have to pay the lad who works with him (his son-in-law's mate, apparently) etc etc. He made her feel really guilty. Anyway, following that he then phoned me saying that if everything goes tits up to get back to him and that he was disappointed but understood that she needs to be careful with money, THEN said he'd pop round to discuss it, ending the conversation with "I'll take my trousers off and put my shorts on for you" (typical!!).

Anyhow, he hadn't turned up by the time we went out at 6pm so tomorrow I'm calling him again to tell him that it's definitely off (just in case he still thinks it isn't) and hopefully one of the two guys who are coming tomorrow and Thursday will give us a decent price without us having to put up with all the sexual innuendo. It's not that I'm a prude, but there's a limit to what's funny and what's not.

MRV. It wasn't the second guy who said anything about laying a lawn - we haven't actually seen him yet. It's this first guy (the one who thinks he's some kind of sex god) who was going to lay the lawn. I didn't think of it being the wrong time of year to be doing that. It'll be interesting to see what the other two say about the lawn when they come to give us a quote. Thanks for mentioning it :)

I shall keep you all updated.

22 Jun, 2010

 

hope everything gos ok for you and you mum take care :o)

23 Jun, 2010

 

You could make an excuse like your mum isn't very well or something like that. I would deffinately put him off somehow. He sounds rather unpleasant to me :o(

23 Jun, 2010

 

Oh no ! Diorritt, please don't let this guy guilt trip you. He has brought everything on himself by his total lack of professionalism and respect for you and your mother as prospective clients. He's a sexist bully boy and you don't owe him anything. Report him to the police. We're all on your side.

Sorry for the rant ! I get so angry at "tradesmen" who try to take advantage of people. Real tradesmen are wonderful and leave you feeling good for having employed them.

23 Jun, 2010

 

Hope all goes well and your mum gets her garden sorted out soon.

23 Jun, 2010

mrv
Mrv
 

Ah, sorry - I must have misread what you said about turfing with a second guy. I do worry about any lawn work at this time of year (begining of June to end of August) - it's just so much work keeping it properly damped down if the weather is hot, to me it's a risky investment. I don't encourage my customers to do it - even patching a bit of lawn can be a right PITA at this time of year.

I really do hope you've got it sorted now without the need to witness his knees in shorts - as any good jobbing gardener will tell you ... our knees are always knackered old things ... even those of us who are in fact sex gods ;-)

24 Jun, 2010

 

LOL. I have two new guys coming in a few weeks now - it'll be interesting see whether they dare show their knees!

The original guy was meant to start tomorrow. I just hope he doesn't show up. At least not before I get there because Mum won't know what to do and I'd hate her to be put into that kind of position.

27 Jun, 2010

 

If he does show, Dioritt, you'll just have to stay firm, and don't give in to any emotional blackmail. I'll be thinking of you and your Mum with my fingers crossed. Please let us know how you go on.

27 Jun, 2010

 

Mm really lucky ecape there Dioritt this was wrong on so many levels hard to know where to start.

As Mrv has stated this really not the time for it esp as most of us have had one of the driest spells for decades.Be a nightmare if your area then got a hosepipe ban.

To suggest that he doesnt do quotes expect you to order all materials - yeah right when turf should be laid within 3 days and he should inspect the quality of it bet he would have tried to sting you for VAT by adding 17.5% to the bill inc his labour when businesses need a turnover of £60k + to claim back VAT , not likely for a jobbing gardener is it ?

Any reputable firm or gardener would break down costs for you inc labour and materials and do all the ordering for you.Sounds like he was preparing excuses to suggest if as likely you were unsatisfied he couldnt be held responsible for the things you ordered.

Some even demand cash upfront never do this if delivered direct then pay on delivery .. given some of his inappropriate comments the mind boggles at what he meant when suggesting you needed to hire a turf stripper !

12 Jul, 2010

mrv
Mrv
 

Turf stripper!!! Turf stripper!!!??? I call that a spade and a wheelbarrow as you're not planning to re-lay Wembley :)

13 Jul, 2010

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