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REASONS FOR NOT BEING ON GOY

17 comments


Hello me dearios:-)
As some of you know, my poor husband has had rheumatoid arthritis for about fifteen years and Alzheimers for about ten years. It took a long time to get a diagnosis. I have noticed with Alzheimers that periods of stability are followed by a sharp drop. This is what happened a couple of months ago. He has become very frail quite suddenly too and very thin. This means I have not had time to come and play …. I have looked in from time to time though:-) I have bought a wheelchair and I can now take him outside when the weather permits so he can at least get out of the house. I am still gardening, it’s an escape and keeps me sane ( some friends would disagree with the sane bit) I will come back on when I can and have even taken some pics although my garden is patchy:-)

Poor old magnolia Susan is in the wrong place and keeps trying to escape.

This lovely evergreen spirea (which I cut back ) was one I saw on our dear Sanbaz’s pics. It’s sharing the pot with heuchera Brass Lantern.

When I have time, I’ll have a look and see if anyone went to the Malvern Show, I didn’t make it this year although I do love it and was told it was much better this year:-)

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Comments

 

I was thinking about you earlier today and was just about to write to find out if everything is ok. I did know a little about your husband's condition but was not aware how serious it is.

Please stay in touch as I love your gentle sense of humour and also looking at your very pretty garden. No need to comment on things but do keep looking.

xx

19 May, 2015

 

I have thought about you too,Ba..and so sorry to hear Derek has deteriorated more,lately.I can only imagine how hard it is,and has been .for you both..I'm glad you are able to get out in your garden more easily now,when possible..and your plants are looking lovely
Dottydaisy went to Malvern,and has posted a lovely blog and photo's,so I hope you will take a look..take care,my friend,and look in when you can xxx

19 May, 2015

 

Sorry to read this news Ba ... good news on getting a wheelchair though as it means you can be out in the fresh air together. Photos of your plants are lovely. I have just posted a blog on Malvern for you! Take care ... :o)))

19 May, 2015

 

Sorry to hear about your husband BA ! It must be so hard for you. But we are all here for you if you want to let off steam . Your garden looks lovely !

19 May, 2015

 

I too am sorry to hear about your husband. I am sure sitting in the garden will be good for him too. I find gardening a great escape when work becomes more than I can put up with. Keeps me sane too Ba.

19 May, 2015

 

Thinking about you both and hope for a lovely warm summer so that you can both enjoy the garden and warm sunshine xxx

20 May, 2015

 

Your garden is very pretty. I'm sure your husband enjoys seeing it and I hope it helps him feel better.
Although I know nothing about Alzheimers, I understand it's a dreadful thing.
However, I can sympathise as regards the arthritis. I have it myself, and Beryl has it quite severely. She is unable to walk now and has a wheelchair for when we go out.
We've had a stairlift and other things done to the house recently, to try and make it a bit easier, but looking after someone takes its toll doesn't it.
It's nice to hear from you whenever you can come on here :)

20 May, 2015

 

Alzheimers is an awful thing, both my Step-Mother and Father-in-law suffered from it, though it is really the carer that has the hardest time. Seeing your loved one in distress is the hardest thing. It seems the long term memory stays it's the short term one that goes, including memories of people close to them. My OH was distressed when his father didn't know who he was, being the youngest in the family, though he knew my OH's brothers. Very sad for you but perhaps the garden has good memories for him and will do him good. Your garden looks wonderful, neat and tidy and must give you a break while you are tending to it. With all best wishes, even though we are in effect strangers, everyone on GOY feels as if we all know each other.

20 May, 2015

 

Ba I didn't know the situation with your OH, it worried me when you disappeared, was hoping you weren't ill, it must be very hard for you sometimes but having the wheelchair has got to make it a bit better even if its only for hubby to be with you in the garden, that of course is if this flipping weather allows, you must have noticed we appear to be going backwards with the wind and temps, no bikinis needed this year Ba, lol....
You take care of yourself as well.. xx

20 May, 2015

 

Wonderful to see some of your lovely plants Ba and good to hear you are managing to get out in the fresh air and by golly it is fresh at times. I hope you are looking after yourself despite times being so hard on you ... luv phyl x

20 May, 2015

 

Thanks for all your kind thoughts and words. I'm afraid my OH doesn't go into the garden, he stopped a good while ago. We used to eat out there when the weather permitted, but he decided a few years ago that he didn't like the insects lol. The chair has allowed me to take him out when I go local shopping or to the medical centre and he can look at gardens on the way and talk about them. I normally catch the bus back though as it is uphill coming back. I've caused quite a commotion with my poor wheelchair driving skills when attempting to get him on the bus, it's really hard manouvering the chair into such a tight space. Everyone is patient with me though, but it's quite embarrassing. I think it does him good to have a change of view. I had a visit from a social worker today and she's going to let me know what help is available so things could be looking up:-)
Terrible changeable weather here, so many seasons in one day, really cold at the moment. I can't believe we're almost into summer, where does the time go?:-(

20 May, 2015

 

Get as much help as you can Ba, my dad refused help when he was a carer for mum, looked after her for over 10yrs and actually ruined his own health doing it, mum wouldn't go outside at all, said she didn't want people looking at her, and wouldn't even sit in the wheelchair let alone go out in it....
I forgot to say earlier, its nice to see your garden and I always think its the best therapy there is....

20 May, 2015

 

It's so nice to hear from you again Ba, I've missed you and your antics...made me laugh many a time!Sorry to hear that your husband is not well, it must be putting a strain on you, but try and "pop in" when you can.Your garden looks a treat by the way!

I'll be thinking of you and hope that some help is not long coming.Take care of yourself M'dear....Valxx

21 May, 2015

 

Push for all the help you can love, there are charities too that can ease the strain, try a bit of googling, I was talking to someone and one of the hardest things for the charities. ...besides money....is actually finding the folk who need the help, doctors used to refer people but they haven't the time these days...

21 May, 2015

 

I agree with Linsclass get as much help as you can. I visted my elder brother in Jersey who is now in a lovely care home . His Daughter has been looking after him from the time he was diagnose with Alizheimer's for 10 years she is a wonderful person. It came to a time when she could not cope so took the advice of her social worker and GP to have him registered in a care home before she herself went into bad health.

June with all the caring you are doing for your husband you are still able to keep your garden in great shape. Take care June

21 May, 2015

 

Thanks again for your kind thoughts and comments. I panic at the thought of having strangers in my house every day ( yes that's right, I'll have to tidy every day .... Eek) I've always been rather a private person, but I know I need help now so must bite the bullet ..... So many of you have sad stories about relatives with Alzheimer's there really does seem to be an epidemic, let's hope they find a cure for this most cruel of illnesses:-)

22 May, 2015

 

So you'll be tidying up before the help arrives to tidy up ... lol! Seriously, Care Agencies do try to keep to the same folk on the same day, so you'll soon get to know them all.

I agree with you about Alzheimers being a dreadful illness, have just heard on the news that the actor Omar Sharif is another one to be suffering from it. :o(

24 May, 2015

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